I Choose Joy Over Junk

 

A sign in one of my favorite auction houses reads, "Junk is stuff we get rid of.  Stuff is junk we keep."  It's true that one man's trash is another man's treasure.  And for the last ten years or so, I've benefited from that philosophy because I have had a small antiques business in a local consignment mall.  One of the most fun things about that business has been shopping at auctions and estate sales, trying to find just the right junk that might turn out to be someone else's treasure.

I used to gripe at my husband for hoarding junk like old parts, wire, scrap
lumber, etc.  He would always tell me that he might need that someday.  As a part of my little antiques business, I've sold some things on e-bay.  So I must admit that, in the process, I've become a hoarder of "good" cardboard boxes, bubble wrap, peanuts, and tissue paper, using the excuse, "I might need that to mail something someday!"  I now have a large closet that is dedicated to boxes and bubble wrap.  (The photo to the right is one corner of my office. Honesty is sometimes painful.)   So I can't gripe at my husband about hoarding junk anymore.

The problem with junk is that it takes up space that could be used for something much better, much prettier, or more valuable.  Sometimes the junk takes over to the point that you can't see anything but the junk.  The first picture above came to me in an e-mail, challenging me to find the black and white cat in the photo.  I never did find it! 

Does junk clutter your life?  I'm not talking about old parts, wire, or bubble wrap.  I'm talking about junk like bitterness, jealously, envy, or any other negative influence that you allow to crowd out your joy.  Sometimes it's junk that other people bring into your life like gossip, drama, verbal or even physical abuse. 

If you have allowed the junk pile in your life to grow, perhaps as a result of an old hurt, injustice, fear, frustration or disappointment, then you need to clean house.  Let go of that junk, forgive the person who hurt you or let you down.  You are not hurting that person by holding onto your anger and bitterness, you are only hurting yourself.  You are allowing that person or situation to continue to have control over you, perhaps even years and years later.  In stead, turn that old situation over to God.  Allow Him to deal with it, and allow him to sweep out every remnant of junk from your life.  Allow Him to breathe new life into you, encouraging you to go in a new direction, away from the hurt, and toward your Comforter who wants to give you peace, hope, and complete joy.  Consider the following verses from God's holy word:

• "Never take vengeance into your own hands, my dear friends: stand back and let God punish if He will. For it is written: ‘Vengeance is mine. I will repay’." Romans 12:19 (J.B.Phillips New Testament)
• "And whenever you stand praying, if you have anything against anyone, forgive him and let it drop (leave it, let it go), in order that your Father Who is in heaven may also forgive you your [own] failings and shortcomings and let them drop." Mark 11:25 (Amplified Bible)
• "Here is a last piece of advice. If you believe in goodness and if you value the approval of God, fix your minds on the things which are holy and right and pure and beautiful and good. Model your conduct on what you have learned from me, on what I have told you and shown you, and you will find the God of peace will be with you."  Phillipians 4:8-9 (J.B.Phillips New Testament)

If you are continuing to allow another person to contribute to the junk pile in your life, put a stop to it right now.  Recognize that this person is a negative influence on you and that you are being harmed by him or her.  Decide now to place a wall of protection around yourself and your family -- yes, the junk you allow to be piled into your life affects the people around you, especially those closest to you.  Setting a boundary might mean something as simple as declining social invitations, or finding a new circle of friends.  But it might mean something as drastic as changing the locks on your doors.  If that person continues to try to be a part of your life, you may need to let him or her know, in as loving a way as possible, what it is they are doing that is harmful to you, and what needs to happen before you will remove the boundary you are setting.  In the case of physical abuse, leave now.  If you do not have family or friends who can help you, there are shelters available to you.  Your abuser may have tried to belittle you, but please know that your life is precious and full of potential.  God did not create you to be someone's junk pile.  Read what God has to say:

• "Any who love knowledge want to be told when they are wrong. It is stupid to hate being corrected."  Proverbs 12:1 (Good News Translation)
• "He who walks with wise men will be wise, but the companion of fools will be destroyed."  Proverbs 13:20 (New King James Version)
• "Discipline yourselves, keep alert. Like a roaring lion your adversary the devil prowls around, looking for someone to devour." 1 Peter 5:8 (New Revised Standard Version)
• "For the Spirit that God has given you does not make you slaves and cause you to be afraid; instead, the Spirit makes you God's children, and by the Spirit's power we cry out to God, 'Father! my Father!'"  Romans 8:15 (Good News Translation)
• "For God gave us not a spirit of fearfulness; but of power and love and discipline."  2 Timothy 1:7 (American Standard Version)

Remember, we are instructed to forgive.  So if your friend or family member genuinely changes his or her behavior and is truly showing a willingness to quit unloading junk into your life, let the boundary down and give your relationship another chance.  That might mean a time of professional counseling and a gradual loosening of the boundaries.  I have personally witnessed seemingly impossibly broken relationships healed and restored, families saved and made even stronger as a result of firm boundaries being erected and loving forgiveness being extended and accepted. 

But if the other person refuses to make any changes, it might mean that you have to let go of the relationship permanently.  That does not mean you are relieved of the obligation to forgive.  Forgiveness may have no effect on the other person, but it will help you to move on to joy, avoiding the junk pile of anger and bitterness.
    

Just like it is probably time for me to clean out the junk from my closet and the corners of my office, now is the time for us to clean the junk from our lives.  I hope you will join me this week in this prayer, adapted from 2 Corinthians 7:1 (Complete Jewish Bible):  "Therefore, (Dear God), since we have these promises (from you), (help) us purify ourselves from everything that can defile either body or spirit, and (help us) to be completely holy, out of reverence for (You)."